ARE YOU MORE GHETTO THAN A FIFTH GRADER?
The phrase "Are you more ghetto than a 5th grader" is a play on the game show "Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader?" but uses the term "ghetto" to ask about a person's background or cultural practices, not their intelligence. To answer the question, you would compare a person's experiences with a list of indicators often associated with certain cultural backgrounds, such as the examples found in the "You Might Be Ghetto" section of the candy lady's book.
Here's a breakdown of the phrase:
- "Ghetto": In this context, it's not referring to the historical definition of a segregated area but rather to cultural practices or experiences.
- "More than a 5th grader": This part draws a parallel to the game show, implying that a person might be more "ghetto" than a child who is still learning basic concepts.
To determine if someone fits the description, you would look for things like:
- Eating sandwiches with unusual condiments, like mayonnaise or mustard without meat.
- Drinking water out of a mayonnaise jar.
- Freezing batteries for later use.
- Drying clothes on a fan.
Please Take The Plunger...My bad I mean the plunge to see...IF:
Feeling Ghetto & You Don't Know Where To Turn??????

Are You More Ghetto Than A 5th Grader?
ARE YOU MORE GHETTO THAN A FIFTH GRADER?
PART ONE
1. Ever ate a mayonnaise sandwich....
a. Ever ate a mustard sandwich....
Hold up wait!
LIke Nate Dogg said I didn't say that there was any cold cuts on these sandwiches. So if you are picturing cold cuts STOP IT!
2. Ever ate a sandwich spread sandwich....
3. Ever ate a syrup sandwich...
4. Ever drank water out of a mayonnaise jar.
a. Ever drank water out of a syrup jar...
5. Ever froze batteries in the freezer for later use...
6. Ever dried your clothes on a fan...
7. Was your allowance the equivalent of pocket change found in the sofa...
8. Ever had the urge to say 'if am one of y'all'...put your paws on me....
9. Ever had an urge to say 'you're a liar and the truth ain't in you.'
10. Ever turn in pop bottles for the dime deposit...
11. Ever watch an episode of "Good Times" and thought it was Reality tv...
12. Ever wear leg warmers to hide the fact you were wearing floods?
13. If you and your uncle and your aunt are the same age...
14. Have the sudden urge at times to say kemo, kimo, spare a spare...
15. Ever owned a double belt and when you think no one is looking you try to see if it will still wrap around you twice again.
16. Ever Owned a pair of Chinese baby doll shoes with the red sole.
17. Ever shopped at Greenman's Department Store...
18. Were you ever afraid of the monster underneath the Ogden Bridge.?
19. Ever knew someone who said they were kin to the Jackson, Sylvers or Debarge families...
20. Have you ever ate 'scrimp' fried rice?
21. Have a 'movie theater purse' that you keep in the trunk of your car for special occasions when you bring a lot of family members to see a movie?
22. Ever wear a wig to work and at lunch time go home and take it off and go back to work and wonder why everyone is staring at you?
23. Ever asked someone for a chance?
24. Ever gave someone a chance?
25. Ever had the urge to tell someone that they 'smell like sheep shit in shallow water?'
26. Ever purchase candy from Mrs. Sweezer at 365 W. Oak...
27. Ever purchase candy from Mr.
Gardener in 923 N
Sedgwick...
28. Ever buy candy from Mr. Lindsey's candy truck at 1230 Larrabee...
29. Ever buy candy from Mr. Hampton in 534 W. Division...
30. Ever attend parties in the basement of 911 on Fridays and Saturdays hosted by MrTaylor...
31. Ever purchase double sided 45 rpm hits from Jerome's on Division?
32. Ever purchase 45 double sided rpm hits from Dorothy's on Division.?
33. Ever shop at A&D and Jets...
34. Ever shop at Miss Samella or Miss Rose...
35. Ever shopped at James' or Frank's or Miss Hips or Miss Ellie Mae's...
36. Ever take tap or jazz lessons with Miss Beard at Seward Park...
37. Ever sing these words while playing jump rope 'I don't want to go to Mexico no more more there's a big fat man knocking at my door door door, he grabbed me by my collar he made me spend a dollar...'
38. Ever sing this song while playing rope 'Take a peach take a plum take a pocket full of gum don't like it take it up take it down take it all the way around'....
39. Ever sing this song while cheering with your friends...My name is LISA tell it....tell it...and I'm on the line and I'm gone do it with my zodiac sign. I said it's hard to be a Leo...I said it's hard to be a L-E-O! You better shut me up before I lose my freaking mind....I said it's hard to be a L-E-O!
40. Are you still pen pals with your friend from Right On! Magazine?
41. Ever purchase a book called Damn, Candy Man He Ain't All That I Lived Beneath The Candy Lady For Years?
42. Ever Wrote a book tired Damn, Candy Man He Ain't All That I Lived Beneath The Candy Lady For Years?
43. Have you ever told someone 'you're going to get your body shook, your money took and your name written in the undertakers book...
44. Has anyone ever told you you're going to get your body shook, your money took and your name written in the undertakers book...
45. Did you ever have a cousin who told you when Soul Train was located in Chicago that they were going to on the show and each week they had you watch and you NEVER saw them on the show...
46. Did you ever fall madly in love with Too Sweet from The Penetentiary franchise not cuz he was all that or even a great actor but you fell in love with Too Sweet cuz that's about all On TV & Spectrum showed back on the early 80's?
47. Did you ever go in the bathroom in the dark and say Bloody Mary 2 times and run out cuz you were afraid if you said it a third time the mirror would crack and Bloody Mary would come out and grab ya?
48. Did you ever move out of Cabrini 🍏 Green after Candy Man came out cuz the movie was just so bad so you moved out on GP or General Principle...
49. You ever tell someone you gone need me B4 I need you?
50. Somebody ever told you you gone need me B4 I need you?
51. You ever tell someone 'Bet not Am one' of y'all touch my sister or brother?
52. Ever go to Lincoln Park High School to learn Spanish and learned the phrase: Esta Suzan in casa..and your reply had to be 'No en la Cocina'...
53. When you were sweeping as a kid and you couldn't readily locate the dust pan did you ever have the propensity to grab one of your parents albums...i.e. your mom's Cher Half Breed album to get up the trash...
54. Ever thought that Leon Isaac Kennedy & Jayne Kennedy were athe first power couple?
Congratulations if you answered yes to most of these questions....you are a bonafide ghetto starter kit. Pat yourself on the butt!

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